The Challenges of Men That Women Don’t Understand

Women think that being a man is easy. Sure, a guy might have to unclog a septic tank and shovel the driveway, but many women think that men are free from obligations and worries.

Nothing could be further from the truth. There are certainly advantages to being a man, but it’s not all rainbows and lollipops. Being a man can be challenging.

Women often fail to understand many of the challenges of being male, such as:

1. Men have to earn love. The purpose of a man in a relationship is largely utilitarian. Men can be loveable, but they aren’t loved unless they provide some additional value beyond their good looks, stunning personality, and loyalty to the Red Sox.
   
   • Women, children, and pets can be loved just for being who they are. Men don’t get a lot of mileage from following this strategy.
     
   • Women don’t usually want to move downward from one guy to the next. It’s only onward and upward.
     
2. Men are expected to be stoic. Guys do want to cry from time to time, but it’s frowned upon. Most women are less attracted to a man that cries with any regularity, and most men would rather set themselves on fire than be around a man that’s crying.
   
   • Men are expected to handle every challenge life throws at them with ice water in their veins and a small smirk. And, they’re expected to do it without help.
     
3. Many men are lonely. Most single men are alone a lot more than they want to be. Arguably, most married men are alone a lot less than they’d like to be. However, single guys are lonely a lot of the time, even if they won’t admit it. Many men don’t readily form friendships with other men.
   
4. Men are criticized for their basic instincts. It’s natural for men to be attracted to younger, attractive women. In the past, healthy, younger women were more likely to survive childbirth and have multiple children. The men that chose these women had the most children. Their sons inherited the same tendency.
   
   • It’s not a man’s fault that he’s not attracted to unhealthy women. By the same token, it’s not a woman’s fault that she’s naturally attracted to a man with monetary, physical, and social resources.
     
   • The same phenomenon played out thousands of years ago and, despite our efforts to change it, this instinct still shows up often.
     
   • Naturally, this doesn’t apply to men using their strength to overpower women for their own desires. This behavior is despicable any way you look at it.
     
5. Men are criticized for taking care of their own needs. Men that put themselves first are considered selfish. Women that do the same are considered to be independent.
   
   • They always say, “Save the women and children first.” No one ever says to save the men first.
     
6. Men are often expected to make the first move romantically. Is this a blessing or a curse? Men have to put themselves out there and take the risk, but at least they don’t have to wait around for something to happen. We’ll call this one a draw.
   
7. Men rarely receive compliments. Women would be surprised by how infrequently men receive a genuine compliment. Give a sincere compliment and a big smile to a man and notice the confused look on his face. Go ahead. Do it.
   
8. The family court system is often unfair toward men. This happens in some states more than others, but the bias toward keeping the children with the mother is often a force to be reckoned with.
   
9. Men rarely get out of traffic tickets. Seriously, just ask your women friends if they or their other women friends ever get out of traffic tickets and how they do it. In all likelihood, a man won’t be able to use his “manly wiles” to get out of a traffic ticket and will have to rely on the mercy of the judge if he can’t afford the ticket.

It isn’t easy to be a man. It’s even harder to be a man that women and other men approve of. Men do have it easier in certain aspects of life, but manhood isn’t for the weak.

Both men and women would benefit from understanding the challenges that the other gender faces. Life is challenging for everyone!